Groping for the Next Rung…

Have you ever felt you were groping for the next thing to do?  Did you arrive at a fork in your journey and you couldn’t decide to go right or left?  Is it late enough in your personal journey to know that this may be your last major fork; therefore, you want to get it right this time?

I’ve felt all of the above and at the same time felt grateful that I could possibly make a choice.  I know that ultimately none of it will matter; and I know that everything I do matters energetically.  I hold space for both these ways of being.  Like life herself, I am required to hold joy and sorrow in my heart.

I wrote the following poem Blank at a time when I was feeling I needed to find my compass, make a choice at the fork, and allow joy to whisper in one ear while sorrow whispered in the other.


When I think of myself

doing something – anything

in my mind’s eye

I’m younger and enthusiastic.

Then I realize.

She no longer resides in me.

She resides in my thoughts and memories.

I don’t yet know this older me.

I try to see her in my imagination.

She won’t come.

She leaves me blank

and groping

for the next rung.

My poem Blank is published in the anthology:   Inner Lives  Women Writers Explore their Identity, Expression and Transformation. 

About Sabra Bowers

Poet / Blogger / Writer
This entry was posted in Poetry, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

16 Responses to Groping for the Next Rung…

  1. sorrygnat says:

    reaching for the next rung strikes me as growth – lovely post; luck and love

  2. Veronica Roth says:

    Sabra, I so get that! I’m all over the place a artistically and can’t settle on one discipline. But I don’t think it’s a bad thing. I think it’s a fascination with the creative that stops me from only sticking to oils, or poetry, or illustration and developing that discipline. Told myself loads of times to stick to one, but can’t do it. 🙂

    • Sabra Bowers says:

      Yes, it is that multiple creative energies call to us. Well, you did choose your a creative life. You are so blessed and I know I’m blessed that our paths crossed and I get to peek at your creativity.

  3. bmorrison9 says:

    Oh yes! You capture so well the different selves. I was shocked to realize that those things I’d always meant to do? maybe I didn’t still want them after all.

    • Sabra Bowers says:

      Thank you, Barbara. Yes, I do think there comes a time in our journey when the time for something has passed. We should embrace and not miss the never ending opportunities that still await us on our journey by not hanging on to what could have been. Sounds like you are doing just that very thing. All the best to you!

  4. Sabra, this is a wonderful poem! I so much hear you 🙂
    Sending kisses and love your way!

  5. Thanks Sabra… Kinda been there, done that. Your poem nailed it.

  6. Kris Swanguarin says:

    “I am required to hold joy and sorrow in my heart.” How is it one sentence can hold so much truth and beauty? Well put, Sabra. I am certain you will make the right choice(s).
    Thinking over your post I was moved to write a haiku for you.

    On a blanket of snow
    I walk under great-forked trees,
    forgetful of fallen leaves.
    Some time ago I wrote an impromptu prose poem that looked at age and perception. You can find it on my blog here.
    Thank you for this blog post and poem.

  7. Sabra Bowers says:

    Kris, I treasure your response. I have another poem I wrote about joy whispering in one ear and sorrow in the other. I will post it sometime. I really like your haiku. I especially like trees because I can sense the living presence in them. Thank you for sharing it with me. I read your blog and left a comment. It is a beautiful piece and I’m so glad you pointed me toward it. I look forward to reading more of your work.

  8. ceciliag says:

    that is a fantastic poem, I looked in the bathroom mirror the other day and got a fright, I was looking at my mother, she died when she was 49 (younger than me now) so I did not look too bad but I said out loud. This is not me!. Maybe i should look in the mirror more often in case I forget myself!! good morning.. c

    • Sabra Bowers says:

      Thank you for reading my poem. I’m so glad you like it. Sometimes my movements and facial expressions feel like my mother. It seems to me that I can feel her essence in my body. The older I get, the more my body motions feel like my mother’s looked to me. Does that make sense?
      I enjoyed reading your blog and will be visiting again. Stay in touch.

  9. cindy knoke says:

    i think you have found the next rungs, and the ones after that, and you are still climbing, up and up you are going!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s